It's been a long time

Wow!! It's been a while since I posted. I actually had what I thought was a brilliant post about a week ago, but it disappeared somewhere. I was too tired to think about it again, so I just opted not to post.

So much happening. This afternoon I'm going to do one of the hardest things I'll probably ever have to do. A friend that I met through the Family Resource Center in Baldwin buries her 4 month old son today. I can't even imagine the pain that Jennifer and her family are going through. Zachariah Smith died on Tuesday, March 27, of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome). I'm going to the funeral to be there for Jen. I've never been to a funeral for a baby before. It just doesn't seem fair, Lord! I know life isn't always fair. Please be with that family now. Help them feel you in a very real way as they grieve.

SIDS. I HATE THOSE LETTERS. Do you know that it wasn't until Hope was well over 1 year old that I finally started sleeping better at night?? I was so afraid of SIDS. Just before she was born I went out and bought one of those monitors that you place underneat the baby's crib mattress. If the monitor doesn't detect any movement in the crib for like 20 seconds, an alarm goes off. Not only does the alarm wake the baby, but it alerts the parents that something might be wrong. We never used the alarm. I did a lot of soul searching and finally came to the conclusion that Hope's life is in God's hands and there's really nothing I can do about SIDS. And now Hope is 20 months old. She's made it so far. We thank God for that several times a day. And yet several times a night I find myself still checking on her. It used to be every hour on the hour (or more). Now I've let myself relax enough to only check on her two or three times. I talked to the parent of a 12 year old the other day about this. She says she still checks on her daughter once a night. There really is no more sleeping through the night once you become a parent. Because then they grow up to be teenagers and they're out late with their friends...and you wait up and worry.

The weather matches my mood right now. It's rainy and overcast...and yet the sun is trying with all its might to poke through the clouds. That's a great analogy to life, isn't it?? Sometimes life sucks! Sometimes the rain clouds come in to stay for a while. Yet God tries with all His might to make himself known. Sometimes we let Him...sometimes we don't.

I just finished teaching the 3rd of 3 sessions of a 1st Communion Class to 3rd graders. 3 girls, 2 boys. What a great goup of kids. I just love them and so look forward to getting to know them as they grow spiritually. It's days like this that remind me of why I do what I do. It's not the "busy" part of ministry that makes me tick. It's the quiet times I have with kids where I can teach them what I know...and where I can learn from them all the things I don't yet know. I want to make faith real to them. I don't want to make it all about activities and Easter Breakfasts and youth gatherings, etc, etc, etc. I want to make it life. I want to make it every day. I'm not exactly sure how to do that, but I'll keep trying.

On a really exciting note: our friends Ron and Beth (who we're looking forward to spending time with tomorrow) are hearing rumors that referrals have landed in the US. What does that mean?? I don't know all the details, but what I do know is that if referrals have really landed in the US, that means sometime this week they'll be seeing the pictures of their daughter for the very first time. I'm so excited for them. This adoption journey has been so long for them. They're adopting a baby (most likely a little girl) from China and have had to be so, so patient. They have to have butterflies in their tummies now, thinking about how this could be the week that totally changes their lives. I think how it works is that once they get the referral, they'll know when they get to travel to China to hold their baby in their arms. How I wish I could be a fly on the wall the first time they meet their precious child for the first time. It's probably a good thing I won't be a fly on the wall because flies don't cry, do they?? I'd explode with tears of Joy. Hey Beth and Ron...I just want to let you know that Melody is a really nice name for a little girl. hehehe Anyway, like I said earlier, we get to spend time with Ron and Beth tomorrow and we're looking forward to that. They are going to take our geocaching virginity away from us. hehehe Geocaching is a high tech treasure hunt. That should be interesting since I just got my very own cell phone yesterday. Talk about technologically slow!! Mark and I have been sharing a phone until now. And my phone even has a camara. How cool is that?? hehehe Now I realize that most 12 year old have had cell phones with cameras for years now, but I'm still excited.

OK...I'm rambling. Time to get a few more things done in the office and then change clothes and head to the funeral. Please keep my friends Jen and her hubby Wayne in your prayers as they mourn the loss of baby Zachariah. And please keep Beth and Ron in your prayers as they (hopefully) "meet" their baby this week via a picture. I think we've come full circle.

Love,
Melody